It’s been a very long and hard week, mentally for me. It’s the roller coaster that I have trouble holding onto. It’s nearly like the roller coaster goes just underneath water, where I can reach out and wave and beg for help…but I just can’t breathe. Sy and Nala tried helping the best they could…but there’s only so much you can do from 1000 miles away. You can only take so much drowning.
I have been listening to and reading “The Heroin Diaries”. It is a book written by Nikki Sixx from Motley Crue fame (if you didn’t know…) and the music was of course written by him and performed by Sixx:A.M. It is mostly his diary for a year while he was touring, right before he got clean with commentary from him and a lot of people that knew him then. I’ve never been addicted to any kind of drugs…but I totally related to some of those diary entries. Depression is just such an ugly, unforgiving disease. Add the anxiety to that and it’s a real treat *rolls eyes*. Thus, you are getting to see the “darker” side of Cay. Sometimes life is just not always shine, glitter and rainbows.
Here’s a song from the album, which inspired the title of this post and picture: Van Nuys.
On a brighter note, I am loving this dress from Oubliette at Ostara’s Altar. The fatpack comes with all sorts of colors, so even though I am feeling “dark” I still got my colors. The event is only open until April 3rd!
Body: Maitreya Lara
Head: Catwa – Uma
Skin: DeeTaleZ – Heidi, European (currently at Skin Fair)
Ears: Mandala – Steking Season 5
Hair: Magika – Good Vibes
Dress: Oubliette – Maia Mermaid Dress, Blue/Green (currently at Ostara’s Altar Event)
Shoes: Empire – Impomoea
Tattoo: Carol G. – Pretty Roses, Black